The Unconquerable Love of Jesus

Today would have been my son Jim’s 35th birthday. My wife and I plan on going out to the cemetery to put a few fresh flowers on his grave and then spending the rest of the day hanging out together giving comfort and love to each other. Even though it has been seven years since Jim went home to be with our Lord and Savior, it sometimes feels just like yesterday when my wife and I received that devastating news of his suicide. Sometimes the hardest emotion to overcome is the guilt that comes from not being there when your child needs you the most.

God has been so good to us over the years and has given us so many blessings. I want to personally let all of you mom and dads out there know that if you have ever had a child die, for any reason, my sincere condolence and prayers go out to you. I can tell you personally that even though the grief and pain returns every now and then, I can testify to you this day that you can still have the peace, joy and happiness if you have Jesus Christ as your Savior and Lord.

President Obama Endorses LGBT Youth 'Spirit Day'

By Kathleen Gilbert

WASHINGTON, D.C., October 22, 2010 (LifeSiteNews.com) - President Barack Obama has issued a message exhorting young people who consider themselves homosexual to "be true to" themselves and recognize their sexual tendencies as "a source of pride, and a source of strength."

Obama issued the remarks in the wake of a nationwide "Spirit Day" in which celebrities, media, and schools across the nation wore purple to express solidarity with homosexual youths who have committed suicide. Click here to read the full story.

__________________________________________________

This is a very passionate and heartfelt speech that our president is giving to the young folks out there that are being bullied because of their sexual orientation. There is never a good reason to bully another person! My heart continues to go out to those lost souls who could not see a light at the end of the tunnel but only a freight train coming at them.

My heart is saddened because the Gay, Lesbian, and Straight Education Network (GLSEN) hailed the video of the president's speech as an "historic" boost to the homosexualist campaign towards youth. "The President's empathy and concern, so clearly and directly expressed, is an historic contribution to the outpouring of support for LGBT youth we have seen over the past few weeks," stated the GLSEN blog. No wonder our young folks are so mixed up with all of the different signals they are getting bombarded with.

I continue to pray for the families that are left behind to deal with the end-results of suicide. I pray for the young folks out there who allow their sexual desires to overcome them to the point of sinning against our Almighty God. My prayer is that they will repent of their sins and come back to the Lord and allow Him to get them through these tough times in their lives. May our Lord have mercy on our souls.

Between the Boy and the Bridge — A Haunting Question

I am haunted by the one question that seems so obvious and clear in the account of Tyler Clementi’s tragic death. In those days of crushing anguish, humiliation, and confusion, was there no one who could have stood between that boy and that bridge?

Dr. R. Albert Mohler, Jr.

Monday, October 4, 2010

By all accounts Tyler Clementi was an 18-year-old young man who was excited to be a freshman in college, gifted as a violinist, and looking forward to the future. All that changed last week when he walked out onto the massive George Washington Bridge that connects New York with New Jersey and jumped 200 feet to his death.

The last few days of Tyler Clementi’s life were a cauldron of confusions. Over the course of three days, he learned that his roommate at Rutgers University, also age 18, had surreptitiously turned a webcam toward his bed, filming him in a romantic encounter with another male student. The roommate employed social media to inform friends of the event, turning what Tyler Clementi assumed was a private moment into a devastating public disclosure. Click here to read full story.

___________________________________________________

After reading this story, I am also haunted by the same question that Dr. Mohler had.  In those days of crushing anguish, humiliation, and confusion, was there no one who could have stood between Tyler Clementi and that bridge?

I ask you the same question that Dr. Mohler posed too his readers. What if Tyler Clementi had been in your church? Would he have heard biblical truth presented in a context of humble truth-telling and gospel urgency, or would he have heard irresponsible slander, sarcastic jabs, and moralistic self-congratulation? What about Asher and Billy and Seth?

Footprints

This morning while I was meditating on God's Word, I began to think back on all of the times in my life that my Lord and Savior helped me through some most difficult days. I began to think of the words in the poem "Footprints", where God had never abandoned His child, but was in fact carrying him when he was in his darkest hours.

Today is my son Jim's birthday. Even though it has been over six years now that Jim took his own life, today it seems like it was just yesterday.

Father God, there are so many blessings that you have given to me over the years. I thank you daily Lord that before Jim died he accepted You as his Savior and Lord. Heavenly Father, I thank you for carrying me through those rough years of my life. I thank you Lord for giving me the peace, joy and happiness that only an intimate relationship with You can bring. Love, Your child, Lloyd

Memories

Thought of you with love today, but that is nothing new.
I thought about you yesterday, and days before that too.
I think of you in silence, I often speak your name.
All I have are memories and a picture in a frame.
Your memory is a keepsake, with which I'll never part.
God has you in his keeping, I have you in my heart.
Love Always, Mom & Dad

Does the Pain Ever End?

Does the pain ever go away after having someone you love commit suicide? Apparently not! I thought I was doing pretty good this week, even though the 10th marks the anniversary of my youngest son's death. But all of a sudden, while driving over to visit with one of my hospice patients, a song came on the radio that Jim really liked. It just sort of hit me like a ton of bricks... I relived the way I felt six years ago when the police walked up to my door to let me know that they had located my son dead inside his car.

The grief was so overwhelming that I had to pull over to the side of the road. I felt like someone had just reached inside me and pulled my heart out of my chest. I sat there and began talking with the Lord. I said, "Help me Lord! I'm hurting so much inside and the guilt just seems to make it worse." I'm sure if anyone drove by and saw me they would be thinking I was a crazy person talking out loud to himself.

All of a sudden I felt a warm comfort coming over me as if someone was holding me in their arms. Then I heard a voice say, "Come to Me and I will give your rest." Now I wasn't hearing "voices" it was like an inner voice within me. This had never happened to me before and my only reaction was to reply, "Lord, have mercy on my soul!". After about five minutes or so I was able to regain my composure and continued on my way.

After I got home I sat down and opened my Bible to Matthew 11:28-30 where Jesus said,

"Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light."
Thank you Lord Jesus for making my burden's in life easier to handle.

I don't really think that the pain of loosing a child ever leaves us, but when we share our pain, sorrows, burdens, and joys with our Lord, then we will experience the peace and joy that only God can give.

In Memory of our son Jim (1976 -- 2004)

THIS IS MY TESTIMONY -- My name is Jim Cannaday. I’m from Roseburg, Oregon. I’m a welder by trade. I‘m here to tell people about the peace and the love that I have in my life and how they can have that also.

Before I was a follower of Jesus I had no hope for my life. Day by day for 13 years all I thought about was ways that I could kill myself, and that I had no purpose or meaning in my life. Sometimes those thoughts would go away during the day when I was distracted by other things, but every night when I was in bed they came back. Depression was aching pain, never ceasing unless I was sleeping or under the influence of something, and that only postponed it for a short while. Then came the end of the day when all was quiet and the thoughts would return.

My life, now that I have Jesus in it, is completely different. The hope, peace, forgiveness, and love that I have for people and life now is so abundant that my depression no longer has any ground to stand on. New meaning has been given to my life. I have a purpose and discipline, where before I had hopelessness and guilt. I have the knowledge of what is going to happen to me when I die and I’m not afraid any more. I know that I’m going to Heaven and I feel that I have to tell everyone how he or she can know this for themselves.

My parents became Christens about three and a half years before I did. I was always watching what they did and how they acted differently and how they talked. There were obvious signs of change. After Sept. 11th, I started thinking about my life and how none of those people knew that they were going to die that day. I was afraid of going to hell if I died.

One day in a restaurant, I was having lunch with my dad, and we were talking about being a Christian and what that meant. What I heard was that I didn’t have to be perfect and that I could be a Christian if I wanted to. He then asked me if I wanted to ask Jesus into my life and I said YES.

I didn’t stop doing the things that I did right away. Slowly I started feeling guilt about cursing and other things. I noticed that I was asking God to forgive me for things that normally I wouldn’t think twice about. Then one night I was on my way somewhere with a friend and I was telling him how great it felt being a Christian. He told me that he was sick of hearing about it because I was doing the same stuff that I was doing before, getting drunk and high.

The next night, Jan.21st 2002, I got on the Internet and was looking for the sermon that Billy Graham gave to the world after Sept.11th. I didn’t find it, but what I found was his web sight and a section called “My answer”. I started reading and it was like I asked the questions myself. The answers were there and all I had to do was listen. That was the first night of the rest of my Christian life.

All it takes for anyone to become a Christian, and know beyond any doubt that you’ll go to Heaven when you die, is to confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that he died on the cross for your sins and that He was buried and that God raised Him from the dead on the third day. If you pray that, and mean it, and ask Jesus to forgive you, a sinner, for your sins and to come into your life, you will be saved FOREVER!!!

I thank you for listening and allowing me to share my testimony with you. I pray that if you don’t have Jesus in your life, that you will ask Him to come in and take over your heart and life. Thank you.

A Mother's Thoughts (Celebration of Jim's Life)

I want to thank everyone for coming today. I thank all those who have supported us through this loss and especially all your prayers. I can feel your prayers and that is what helps keep me going. I know that with the help of God my family and I will get through this tragedy in our life.

Jim had a lot of friends and family that loved him. I don't think we will ever really know why he felt he had to end his life. I do know that depression can cause people to do things without thinking them through.

Those people that have known us for a while know that this was not the first time Jim tried to end his life. Back in December of 1998 we spent time in the hospital watching him die. That`s where I met Pastor Robbins. He was the Chaplain for the Sheriff's office and he came to give us support. He spent time praying with us and comforting us. God chose to answer those prayers by bringing Jim back to us.

Well, as you know, since that time Jim came to love the Lord and accept the free gift of salvation by accepting Jesus as his Lord and Savior. He knew he had the assurance that he was forgiven and would have eternal life in heaven. As long as he was in fellowship with the Lord and read the bible he seemed happy. He gave up drugs, alcohol and smoking. He witnessed to friends, family and even strangers about the Lord. He wanted all his friends and family to know how they could have the free gift he had. He wanted them to be saved.

So what happened to Jim? When Jim got out of fellowship with God and stopped fellowshipping with other Christians some of the old habits came back. The depression came back. I didn't realize how bad it was because he didn't stay around us much the last few months.

Instead of looking to God for the answers he looked at how drugs made him feel. They helped him forget. Satan took advantage of this situation and without the armor of God Jim couldn't fight the depression. Does that mean that Jim didn't have faith in God? No. What he did was against God's laws but Jim knew God was a forgiving God. Jim knew from his faith that once you accept Christ as your Lord and Savior you were saved for eternity. We will see Jim again when we get to heaven because he was a Christian.

Those of you that don't know the peace that comes from knowing the Lord are missing out on the most wonderful free gift of a lifetime. Those who are Christians and are out of fellowship with the Lord need to come back to Him. He is always there waiting for us to ask for His help.

I will truly miss my son. He gave the most wonderful bear hugs a mother could ask for. I loved to see his face light up when he was happy. He loved his family and friends very much. In God's timing I will see him again.

God's Healing Grace and Mercy

Well, this is my first post on my blog. I really feel that the Lord has been leading me to communicate His love to all that will listen. I know that somewhere in this world there are people just like me who are having a hard time understanding why certain things happen in our lives.

I truly believe that the Bible is from God. One of my favorite verses in the Bible is Romans 8:28. When my son died in 2004, I mediated on this verse daily trying to make sense of it. How could any good come from the death of my youngest son! I know that the Spirit of God was working because a calm came over me when it finally sunk in what God was trying to tell me.

For you see, our Mighty and Awesome God knows everything from the beginning to the end. My younger son, before he died, was on fire for the Lord and was able to witness to several of his friends. I realized in God's timing all things work out to the good for those who love Him. So you might say that this tragedy in my life actually drew me closer to the God of Creation.

I know there are hurting parents out there that have lost their beloved children just like me and my wife. I am telling you today, that a personal relationship with our Lord Jesus Christ can and will see you through the rough times. Let me hear from some of you who have been through the ordeal of loosing a child. May God bless each and every one of you.